There is a huge chance I will be seeing my ex husband today. The thought of this makes me hold my breath.
We have Parent Teacher Conferences. We attend these separately, but as these are group settings that 20 or so parents share a time slot, there is a chance that we will be in the same group slot, but not together. These are horrible moments to share as I will one day share. Today, I can't go down that rabbit hole.
These moments are always so difficult for me because I have to do a great deal of inner work to stay focused and present when I am around him.
On the way to work today, my Angels gave me my mantra or focus point for my interactions with him by having the radio station play "Hey Jude," by the Beatles.
I know the words to most of the Beatles songs, but they are not a group that I choose to listen to. Today, for the first time my heart listened to this song. It is our song, mine and my ex's.
He didn't let me into his heart and that pretty much sums up why we are divorced.
From here forward, I will let the words of this song play in my heart when I have to be around him. I will take deep breaths and pray for him to open his heart to someone. I do wish happiness and love for him.