I woke up thinking about the emotional house cleaning I need to do.
Beside letting go of the stories I keep telling myself about who I am and what I came from, I started thinking about my forgiveness list again. A couple of weeks ago I started thinking about all of the people I need to forgive. People who have hurt my feelings, broke my heart, disappointed me and people who I want to forgive me for hurting their feelings, breaking their hearts, and disappointing them.
I reached out to a few people. One of them reached out to me and said that they had no idea I was still carrying this anger. This is what I was thinking about this morning.
I didn't know I was still carrying that anger either. I made my peace with the situation years ago, and while I have not actively thought of them, I realized that it is actually kinda weird that I still had them mentally blocked in my life. I realized that I still have an emotional energy cord to that situation that is holding me back.
It made me start thinking what other old situations and old relationships am I still tethered to? I found a lot of great healers who will "cut cords" for you, but being the emotional person I am, I need to be able to do this for myself as I attach myself and allow myself to be attached to frequently. I found a website where the healer made it very easy to understand how I can cut the cords.
Amanda Linette Meder, Clairvoyant Medium - Author - Spiritual Educator
"You can tell if you have an energy cord if you are preoccupied with an issue, situation, conservation, belief system, judgement, or attitude that belongs to someone else. Can't 'get over' something? Chances are, there's a cord linking you to this person, place or thing. You can also tell if you have a cord if you have a great amount of love, affection, and compassionate feelings for another."
There are some cords you want to keep because cords can be beneficial. Many of us are blessed to have loving cords with someone that allow us to know when our loved one is feeling down or needs us. But if a cord is "inhibiting the growth of you as a soul or preventing you from ‘moving forward’ in your life," then it is time to cut it.
I like to think of the cord cutting having more to do with the emotion or situation than cutting all ties with the person. I am sure I have some people I need to do a final cutting with, but I have found that most of the cutting I need to do is over situations assumed or real that keep me emotionally bound to someone long after I have given or received forgiveness.
Here is what I pulled from Amanda's How To. Click here to see the full article.
1. Identify it.
2. Examine it.
3. Cut it. This is the one I needed. Amanda says that once you have identified which cords need to be cut, then you choose how you will cut the cord. Will it be with a knife, a huge pair of scissors or with the help of your Angels or Spirit Guides? Once you decide on your cutting tool, then cut the cord.
"Then, set the intention that the energetic exchange between you and X now, whole, complete, and is ended in the past, present, and for the future."
4. Follow up. Amanda says "While they may not consciously realize anything happened - their spirit will know." She says to be aware that if the other person is needy or co-dependent and wanted to keep the cord, they will try to reattach it.
"They can think about you (and in turn, you will think about them), they could text or call you, send you a message, or get a friend to contact you. If you’d like to keep the cord cut, you’ll want to resist interacting with this person in any way until they ‘get the hint’ that you aren’t interested in engaging and being attached to their energy."
For me it is very easy to be drawn back in and to have the cord reconnected. Amanda says that this isn't always a one time deal. With some people, you will need to keep cutting the cord after each attempt is made to reconnect.
After the cord is cut, Amanda has the sweetest final ritual. She send pink healing and loving light to seal the cut. She says to, "simply visualize whitish pink light shining down on them from above, as though a spiritual window has opened from the Other Side (Heaven), and sending it’s love down to them."
I have an awful lot that I am avoiding dealing with right now, so having this diversion to focus on for a couple of days is much needed.
I am going to spend my meditation or quiet time on thinking about who I still feel connected to that isn't serving me, on what emotional ties I need to let go of on anything that isn't allowing me to move forward.
I love how easy and quick this whole ritual is. I love that I now have a "closure" for the forgiveness process.
How to Cut Cords with Someone, Amanda Linette Meder
Happy All Saints Day!!
My Angel card today is Opportunity to Forgive.
When I look back over my days & months in my journal, a lot of my cards deal with Forgiveness. I truly get why this theme is so pervasive in my readings. In my heart, I have a lot of people that I need to forgive. I also have a long list of things I need to forgive myself for.
The meaning to the Opportunity to Forgive card says that "the Angels sent you this card because they see that you've grown weary of reoccurring negative patterns in your life."
Yes I have. Weary so describes how I feel.
"To break this cycle, it is important for you to release old toxic thoughts." "You can do this by breathing deeply & on each exhalation give your fears, worries, anger & other painful emotions to the Angels."
I adore this Angel Card deck! All of the cards are beautiful and uplifting, no doom & gloom. Each morning I am given a beautiful idea to consider as I move throughout my day.
Then in my daily random flip to a page in Miracles Now, by Gabrielle Bernstein, I landed on #57 Surrender It All. It seems I have another day of forgiveness and surrender in front of me.
"Try not to pray for a specific outcome--instead pray for peace. Accessing a perfect state of peace of mind is really all we need." MM#57 I surrender it all.
So, I am going to work on forgiveness this month.
I know I will be working on it for way longer than a month, like daily for-e-ver, but I need to get some of the smaller, easier to release old emotions out of my head & heart. A couple of days ago I saw a name flash across my phone that I haven't actively seen in a very long time. It is someone I have cared deeply about. Her connecting even in such a small way started the wheels turning and I know that today's release of old toxic thoughts will be to her (and him).
I am also sending out a special prayer to a good friend who is taking part one of the bar exam today! She doesn't need my prayer because she will kick ass today, but prayers help us stay connected to those we love.
There is a huge chance I will be seeing my ex husband today. The thought of this makes me hold my breath.
We have Parent Teacher Conferences. We attend these separately, but as these are group settings that 20 or so parents share a time slot, there is a chance that we will be in the same group slot, but not together. These are horrible moments to share as I will one day share. Today, I can't go down that rabbit hole.
These moments are always so difficult for me because I have to do a great deal of inner work to stay focused and present when I am around him.
On the way to work today, my Angels gave me my mantra or focus point for my interactions with him by having the radio station play "Hey Jude," by the Beatles.
I know the words to most of the Beatles songs, but they are not a group that I choose to listen to. Today, for the first time my heart listened to this song. It is our song, mine and my ex's.
He didn't let me into his heart and that pretty much sums up why we are divorced.
From here forward, I will let the words of this song play in my heart when I have to be around him. I will take deep breaths and pray for him to open his heart to someone. I do wish happiness and love for him.